Holding him, letting himself be comfortable with holding someone which is strange in it's own right, Face gently strokes his hair until he can hear the hollow snore of drugged sleep.
It's going to be fine. He'll be up all night, waiting for Murdock to stop breathing or for them to have to make a run in the middle of the night in equal parts, but at least he's got good company as soon as he can bring himself to work his way out of Murdock's clingy embrace long enough to swap over the tapes.
"You know, this is all right." He whispers, knowing he won't be heard. "I protected you, I did my job." And it feels good to know that he's served his function. But deeper than that even, part of him feels like he's balancing out the inevitable pain he'll cause some day down the road.
"I'm sorry if I ever make you want to hurt yourself, and I'm sorry it's my fault I didn't realize things were bad before they got this bad. I kind of feel like an idiot for not putting it together sooner, I guess I just expected your crazy would involve trying to land a chopper on the roof or embarrassing the cashier at a doughnut place or something. I guess I really don't know what I'm doing here."
Rambling feels good, talking to himself without the filter of judgement.
"Well, I kind of know what I'm doing. I mean, I'm pretty much just rolling with the punches until I do something stupid and you figure out that you're better off without me."
With a soft sigh, he brushes a kiss against Murdock's temple and then worms his way out of bed to dispose of his trash and maybe find something sweet while he watches another tape. It's gonna be a long night.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2013-05-06 09:04 pm (UTC)It's going to be fine. He'll be up all night, waiting for Murdock to stop breathing or for them to have to make a run in the middle of the night in equal parts, but at least he's got good company as soon as he can bring himself to work his way out of Murdock's clingy embrace long enough to swap over the tapes.
"You know, this is all right." He whispers, knowing he won't be heard. "I protected you, I did my job." And it feels good to know that he's served his function. But deeper than that even, part of him feels like he's balancing out the inevitable pain he'll cause some day down the road.
"I'm sorry if I ever make you want to hurt yourself, and I'm sorry it's my fault I didn't realize things were bad before they got this bad. I kind of feel like an idiot for not putting it together sooner, I guess I just expected your crazy would involve trying to land a chopper on the roof or embarrassing the cashier at a doughnut place or something. I guess I really don't know what I'm doing here."
Rambling feels good, talking to himself without the filter of judgement.
"Well, I kind of know what I'm doing. I mean, I'm pretty much just rolling with the punches until I do something stupid and you figure out that you're better off without me."
With a soft sigh, he brushes a kiss against Murdock's temple and then worms his way out of bed to dispose of his trash and maybe find something sweet while he watches another tape. It's gonna be a long night.