The Concept of Settling Down

[notjustaface]

It's been a long couple years, and it's starting to wear on Face - it's starting to wear on all of them, he thinks. And no matter how hard the boss pushes it feels like they're never going to get close to the ultimate goal... to clearing their names and being anything but men on the run.

The natural instinct, the instinct of a con-man, is to find a place and dig in. Start over. New identities, new roots. Of course, that's something he can't voice - not even to Murdock. He knows they wouldn't understand why it's the most viable option when as far as they're concerned freedom could possibly be right around the damn corner.

Still, a little settling down doesn't sound like a half bad idea.

They're just over the US-Mexico border heading into Texas on day four of job that only seems to be getting longer. They won't be stopping until Canada, save for maybe a night in a hotel when they're all so tired and angry at each other they can't think straight. It's Hannibal's shift to drive and BA's tucked into the passenger seat beside them, leaving Murdock and Face to fight against the sway and bump of the dark cargo hold with a few pillows and blankets and their limited baggage.

Groping blindly Face finds Murdock's hand and wraps his fingers around it, squeezing gently. "I'll be glad when this is all over."

Comments

[notjustaface]

Still, he misses the routine of the Army. You knew where you were supposed to be and when - none of this picking up in the middle of the night to drive for three days because the feds were getting hot.

"I wouldn't mind it. Settle down, get a regular job... regular house."

[notthatcrazy]

"Yeah... that'd be great."

It's easy to get lost in the picket fence dreams, even though he has his doubts how well they'd both take to it.

"Have you ever had a regular job?"

The Army doesn't count. They were anything but regular.

[notjustaface]

He can't help but laugh at the question - he pretty much hasn't.

"I did a long con once when I was fresh out of basic..." he snorts softly into Murdock's hair; "I worked for a pizza joint in LA for like a week with the general's daughter."

[notthatcrazy]

"That's the closest you ever got to normal, huh?"

It's almost sad in a way... he's never been normal himself, but at least he had family that cared about him.

[notjustaface]

He shrugs, shifting Murdock's weight just enough to wrap his arm around him.

"Boarding school to bunk house, man." He can't help but laugh slightly at his own pathetic attempt at reality. It's all he knows, really.

"What about you? What'd you do before joining up?"

[notthatcrazy]

"Not like I can talk," he shrugs. "I had a few part-time jobs here and there, but nothin' real steady."

He chuckles softly, shaking his head.

"Just a couple of misfits, ain't we?"

[notjustaface]

"I could see you maybe with a little McJob..." he grins, squeezing him.

"Nothing wrong with starting over a little late to the game... best part of running the con is getting to start over fresh."

[notthatcrazy]

"Pretty much." He smiles against his shoulder.

"What's the longest con you ever ran?"

It's not meant to be judgmental or anything... he's honestly curious.

[notjustaface]

Not exactly sure how to answer that question, if his answer even matters any more, it takes him a few minutes to find the right words.

"My life," he laughs without humor, letting himself relax back against Murdock's solid body. "Seriously, though? A few months... maybe a year. It's hard to remember anymore where the con would end and reality started."

He's never admitted it to anyone, but half the time he feels like everything he's ever done is just some elaborate con.

[notthatcrazy]

"Hey... don't talk like that."

He runs a hand through Face's hair, looking him in the eye even though it's hard to see him in the darkness.

"Maybe now's the time to start being real, huh?"

[notjustaface]

He can still see the familiar shine, though - and it warms him in a way he's slowly getting used to Murdock's reassurances doing.

"Always real with you." His fingers shift under his partner's flannel shirt and hold closer against his layered t-shirt. It's the honest truth, everyone else there's varying degrees - for BA he tries to be the mentor or the cool headed guy that gets shit done, for Hannibal he'll always be the impetuous kid...

Murdock gets the real deal. Whatever that is.

[notthatcrazy]

"I know." He sighs, clasping his hand in his. "And you have no idea how much that means to me."

It's kind of a huge deal, to be honest.

[notjustaface]

"It's kind of..." his tongue hitches, looking for the exact word before sighing; "...terrifying."

And definitely not his usual - then again, nothing about his relationship with Murdock falls under the 'usual' heading.

[notthatcrazy]

"I know."

It's all brand-new territory for them both, which is both terrifying and amazing. Often at the same time.

"We're gonna take care of each other just like always, you know that right?"

[notjustaface]

Squeezing him even tighter, he answers; "You bet we will."

It sounds like an empty platitude, but he does mean it. "You're stuck with me, remember?"

[notthatcrazy]

"Mmmhmm. And glad to be."

That settled, he leans in for another warm, comforting kiss.

"We'll talk to the boss when we stop, okay?"

As much as it's going to suck, they really do need to work this out.

[notjustaface]

Groaning softly, he slumps against him for a bit of exhausted comfort.

"I can take care of it. You don't need to be there."

[notthatcrazy]

Comfort he can happily give. It's rare that he'll accept it when he does.

"I got your back, baby, you know that."

[notjustaface]

It's not like he's good at asking for it - even when he really needs it.

"I know you do... just, uh... maybe have a first aid kit ready."

[notthatcrazy]

"I'm sure it won't be that bad. Probably."

Hannibal tends to save the more physical forms of tough love for deeply serious screw-ups. His fingers brush against a certain faded mark near Face's hairline.

"If it is, I might need to have a chat about leadership skills."

[notjustaface]

He earned that scar - thankfully mostly covered by the hair that's grown well past even skimming regulation length.

"I've known him since I was almost kicked out of the Army about a dozen times... sometimes I deserve a little tough love."

[notthatcrazy]

"Sometimes," he agrees readily. "But saying you're tired and you need to take a rest before you fall apart ain't one of those times."

He doesn't doubt that the boss'll be angry at first, and take a lot of convincing, but this doesn't seem like the kind of situation he'd use force over.

[notjustaface]

The problem is 'I'm tired and need a break' is more apt to come out as 'I'm done with this shit' given the mood he's in now.

Of course, he doesn't admit that much - instead he presses a fond kiss to Murdock's forehead and yawns against his cheek.

[notthatcrazy]

Which is why Murdock wants to be there. You know things are getting hairy when he gets to be the voice of reason.

"Love you," he says simply.

[notjustaface]

Face isn't exactly on his game, he's tired and frustrated and reason is beginning to get a little difficult tap into when it comes to their situation. All told, he's sick of always running.

"I know," he squeezes even tighter, pressing the metal of his faux-wedding bands against Murdock's fingers purposefully. "Love you too, man."